Addict
by rapancheese
Summary: Prophetic nightmares brought about by a mocking jester. Maturity hard gained through depression and fear. The inescapable feeling that something it terribly wrong. Ranma is going to find out just how easy he had it


Alright, just telling you people ahead of time, the characters: Way OOC. Also, while not technically having a sex scene, this definitely alludes to one. So, use your judgment people. Now, I'm not sure what compelled me to write something like this, it certainly is different from anything else I've written, but, I don't know, I'm liking it so far, and it flowed so easily, it practically wrote itself actually. Anyway, tell me what you guys think.

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**Addict**

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**Chapter 1**

**You Know You Have a Problem When…**

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"Oh my, what do we have here?" A voice rang out the darkness.

Ranma had no idea where he was. He could barely make out a figure in the distance; he trudged toward it, noticing that the ground was wet before his feet.

"Oh no, no no no, you don't want to do that…" the voice said.

Ranma ignored it and kept going.

"What a curious one this is…but doesn't he know…" the voice said.

Ranma could now make out that the figure was robed, but nothing more.

"Curiosity killed the cat, curiosity killed the cat..." The voice sang out.

Ranma now saw it had a robe, black and covered with blood.

He could now see the figure move, it was shaking with laughter.

"Let's see the young one's spoils, eh? It's always a good thing, I think, too see one's labor's finally bear fruit, eh?"

All of a sudden light sprang from everywhere at once and Ranma was blinded.

"Oops, I always do forget, we mustn't ever, ever show all the truth at once. It's too much, too much for the poor, poor dear…"

As Ranma's eyes got adjusted to the light, he began too look around.

"What does he see? Hmmm? It doesn't really matter. What he sees is what he gets, what he sees is what he gets…"

Ranma gasped. Around him lay the bodies of his friends and family. Some where mutilated almost beyond recognition, but most were intact, and the eyes of the dead where all fixed on Ranma.

"W-what..." he stuttered.

The figure giggled. "But he is so shocked. How can that be? What will happen always did happen and always will have happened."

"They're all, all…"

"Dead? Dead as a doornail you want to say? Look, look. All here to see you. It's your father and your mother and even your fiancée. All come to see you."

"You…did you…"

"Oh, he's got it! He's a bright one. We were right, see? I killed them, I killed them, I killed them…"

Ranma lunged at the figure, expecting it to dodge out of the way. It didn't move. As Ranma's fist collided with the stomach of the figure, he could feel flesh and bone tear before him. Still the figure did nothing. It took all the blows Ranma rained upon it. Ranma felt the figure give way to his strength, felt the muscles and bones snap sickeningly with every attack, felt the pleasure of each blow he landed. The figure crumpled before him, whimpering feebly.

"You …bastard…I'll…never…forgive…you" Ranma grunted as he kicked at the figure on the ground.

Finally, the figure spoke, "You wouldn't…kill a defenseless old thing like me…would you?"

"…Die." Ranma said calmly, as he swung his fist at the figure's unprotected head. The figure vanished. Ranma felt something grab his neck, and jerk him around. He saw the figure's bloody face, smiling at him.

"My turn." It said as it flung Ranma head-first into a wall.

Ranma woke up in a cold sweat. 'What the…it was…all a dream…that's all…'

But Ranma could remember every detail. The body of his parents, littering the floor like rag dolls, the cold, dead eyes, staring at him…Mr. Tendo, his limbs strewn all over the floor, Nabiki, Kasumi, Akane…all normally so...full of life, now limp and pale…and still their eyes stared…and the feeling of that monster's skin, buckling before his punches…how he had enjoyed that…

Ranma shuddered.

'Maybe I'll…get something to drink', he though to himself.

Ranma walked down stairs, a got himself a glass of water. As soon as he drank it, he realized that Akane was down there too.

"Couldn't sleep?" Akane asked him.

"Nope." He said.

"Me neither."

They both said nothing for a while. Ranma got up to leave.

"Uh, Ranma?" Akane started to say.

"Yeah?"

Akane looked nervously at him for a moment, before lowering her head and turning around.

"No, never mind…" she said as she walked away.

Ranma stared at her retreating figure for a moment, before heading of to bed himself.

It was morning now. A Saturday, Ranma was training in the dojo. He was doing katas.

Ranma flowed from one move to the next, so precisely and unwavering, you'd think he had been born to do it. Each muscle at maximum efficiency, Ranma battled his way through and imaginary horde again and again until his muscles ached. But he wasn't satisfied. Something was wrong. Something was different today.

Oh, not his performance. His skill, his speed, his strength; all were the same as they had been. But…something wasn't right. This was martial arts. This was his ultimate achievement, his chief pride, his primary solace. But, this time, he was just…going through the motions. He couldn't really explain it, it was like he was on auto-pilot. As if he had relieved control of his body and was just observing. His hands and legs were doing this and that, but he…he was somewhere else. He tried again and again, but no matter what, he couldn't get rid of that feeling of detachment. The more he'd try to stop it, the more he'd become aware of it, and the more it disturbed him. Until he didn't want practice anymore, he wanted to scream. He controlled himself though, and decided to stop.

'A walk. Maybe I just need to go for a walk.'

He didn't believe it would help for a moment, but he went anyway. It didn't help, of course, even as he walked, he started to feel like he wasn't in control, his feet kept moving, but he felt like they had a mind of their own, he felt more and more panicked as he found himself walking back to his home. Just as he was about to burst, he saw Shampoo at the front entrance of the Tendo home. She jumped on him and kissed him. He was going to push her away as usual; in his rage, he was even planning on shouting at her, smacking her, whatever it took to get her off his back, but as she kissed him, he realized something.

His lips pressed against hers, he felt suddenly that those were his lips. And his arm that he draped across her slender waist, he felt that come back to him too. It was once again his chest that could feel the soft fabric of her shirt. It was such a relief to him that he just kept going. Kept kissing until he ran out of air. And then he pulled apart.

"Ranma…" Shampoo said, shocked "Why all of sudden you…" was all she got out before Ranma moved in again, desperately seeking that feeling of being in control. He noticed too that when anything he brushed against Shampoo, that he reclaimed too. He pushed her against the wall, and curled his legs around her. He pressed his whole body up against her, he could feel her heart beating, and her chest breathing, and her nipples against his torso, and it was the most wonderful thing he had ever felt.

But he felt hands pushing him away.

"Ranma…" Shampoo said, breathing heavily. "Stop…not…not here…"

Ranma grabbed her arm roughly, and dragged her to his room. No one was home. But at the point Ranma would have let the entire household hear him. But there was no one. No one to hear Ranma's deep grunts, or Shampoo's screams of ecstasy.

Shampoo sighed. She had done it, hadn't she? Ranma was hers now. She had finally caught him. Right between her legs, she had caught him, hadn't she? She knew she should be happy, elated. But she only felt…cold. She shivered. She wasn't stupid. She knew something was wrong. As much as she wanted it, Ranma wouldn't have… would never have…

And his eyes, the way he looked at her, it was…frightening. Something was definitely wrong. She could tell her grandma about this. And Ranma would be in her village within the week. After all, Cologne could easily subdue him, she was much more powerful than he was, she had been holding back because it was Shampoo's duty to catch Ranma. And what just happened, that definitely qualified, after this, her grandma would be free to drag Ranma back no matter how much he kicked and screamed. Shampoo knew this. But she knew just as much that Cologne would never hear of this. No one would. She would not talk about this to anyone, except Ranma. Ranma…she turned to face him, but realized he was gone. Quickly, she put on her clothes, and made her way back home.

Ranma was on the rooftop. He was feeling normal again. Well…except for the remorse. In his mind, he played the scene over and over, Shampoo looking up at him, telling him she loved him, him thrusting, faster and faster, her eyes rolling back as waves of pleasure overcame her, and overcame him too. Yes, it had felt so good then, but now…

'What in the world is wrong with me?' he thought.

'What in the world is wrong with me?' he repeated.

"WHAT IN THE WORLD IS WRONG WITH ME?" he screamed.

Akane came home far too late to notice anything. She had spent most of the day with her friends. They went shopping, had food, saw a movie.

'How boring' she thought.

It didn't used to be. She used to be like every other girl, she would have been perfectly content with the day she had just had. But then a certain boy moved in. And he just had to show her an entirely new world. An entirely different level. She was amazed at first. Like a child, who first realizes that there is an enormous world beyond they're home. But he had ruined it. He shown it to her, and he had taken it away from her. He had proved to her, time and time again, that this was not her world. That this could not be her world. She was too clumsy, too uncute for this world. And it had angered her so. But then this boy, her cruel god, had saved her so many times. Had been put in peril, just to show her this place. Why, she had to wonder. Why did he do it? He says he wants me to take no part, but I can't, not while he's still here, doesn't he understand? He wants me too see, but not to want. It's too much. It's too much to ask of me. So why…

And it had angered her, as things often did. So much that she would sit and fume for hours, about some petty insult or gesture. It may have manifested as jealousy, or contempt, or just plain hatred. But it was all the same. Her feeling of inferiority, compounded by her desperate ambition. But she had fought that battle with herself, ever since he had come. Her simple belief that she could do it, that she was being held back, only temporarily, that was enough to stave of the crushing depression. But that day she had begun to waver. Her last wall was cracking, as she lay on her bed, something broke through, something little, she denied it though, reinforced her wall, reassured herself, restored the equilibrium. It was okay to her. Not much had gotten through. Just a single tear. And that's when Ranma decided to walk in.

Was it fate? Was there truly some guiding force that brought Ranma and Akane in that same place at the right time? Or was it just luck, like all the things in life. Just biological signals through Ranma's brain that compelled him, for whatever reason, to take a left when he normally would have gone straight?

Whatever it was, he was there, and she was there. With that dark cloud of doubt over both their heads, one would expect a storm, but…

"Hi" Ranma said weakly. He noticed the tear, and a wave of fear shot through him. Could she know…no, that's impossible. The awkwardness would have degenerated to their usual fights, but his curiosity was now a fear driven one, much more powerful than just casual interest.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

She didn't move at all. Just faced the ceiling. And was silent. He was prepared to leave but…

"Do you hate me?" she suddenly asked.

Ranma answered "No," without thinking, but as soon as he said it, he knew it was true.

"I don't hate you either" Akane told him. Ranma felt off again, this time because of the girl before him, she sounded different now. A bit more weak, a bit more broken. But was that her, or just his imagination?

"I sometimes think I should hate you Ranma" she continued. "That I would be justified in doing so. Don't you think so to Ranma?" Ranma had no answer for that.

"Not always, but sometimes," she pressed, " you're quite cruel to me sometimes. But I don't hate you. I don't ever hate you. I sometimes think I do, but that's…"

She sighed. "Why are you even here Ranma?"

Ranma shrugged, even though he knew that Akane wasn't looking at him.

Ranma didn't like this. The oppressive air. He felt helpless. He wanted to leave, but at the same time, felt that abandoning Akane like this was a sort of…admittance of defeat. He wouldn't leave. But at the same time, he had no idea what to say, so he just there.

They sat there for a while, neither of them speaking. Eventually Akane moved her head to the side so that she was facing Ranma, and they just sat there, staring at each other.

Ranma couldn't stand the tension anymore.

"You were crying." He blurted out.

"Yeah…" Akane admitted.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because of you." She answered.

Ranma looked down. "Oh."

"No," Akane said, after a moment, "that's not right, it was because of me."

Ranma stared at the floor. "Oh."

"You can't help me Ranma" she told him "so don't just sit there and mope around in my room, it pisses me off."

Any other time, Ranma would have gotten mad at that, or maybe he would have just let it go and walked away. But for some reason, that combination of guilt and fear took over him at that moment.

'I just betrayed her, didn't I? I didn't want this, she didn't want this, but…I have to…I have to make it up to her…don't I?'

And so, Ranma said something that neither he nor Akane suspected him of saying in a million years, "Hey Akane, tomorrow…wanna do something?"

And just as unexpectedly, Akane answered, "Okay."

That night Ranma could not sleep. Something deep within him compelled him to wander. But not to anywhere, to a very specific point. But Ranma did not know this. Does a spider know geometry before he builds his web? Does an eagle know about the bending of light in water, before he hunts for fish?

Ranma walked slowly, walked past buildings and fields and cars and people. He walked until he didn't even know where he was anymore. All he knew was that there was a meadow. And out of nowhere a cold wind blew, and Ranma heard a voice. Seeming to come from everyone at once. He couldn't even tell if the sound was coming from outside of him, or from within his own head.

"Hello young one."

Ranma froze with fear. Because he did know one thing: he had heard that voice before.

"No…" he muttered. "You're a dream, you're not real, you can't be here…"

"That seems strange," said the voice, mockingly, "I cannot be here, but I am, what a strange turn of events."

"What do you want?"

"No." the voice told him sharply, "Don't ask me that. I already know that. Ask me something fun, something interesting, I want us both to learn!"

"Whoever you are, I'll kill you…" Ranma muttered.

"And I you." Said the voice gleefully "I'll kill you and you'll kill me so many times we'll slash each other to bits. But we'll pick up the pieces and we'll both be the stronger for it, or maybe one of us will just go insane…heehee…"

"Then come out and fight!" Ranma yelled.

"Now, why would I do that? Why, it would all end so soon, no fun, no fun at all. No, much better we let all those around you suffer, don't you think?"

"Stay away from my family!"

"Don't say such stupid things Ranma. I'm not real. I can't hurt your friends. Only you can do that. You can, you can, you can…"

"SHUT UP!" Ranma screamed.

"Your wish is my command." The voice said.

Ranma felt at ease now. And tired. He had no recollection of what happened next, but he woke up the next day in his bed, with Nabiki's angry face leering over him.

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Author's Notes: First off, not going to be Ranma-Shampoo, just throwing that out there. Well, like I said, this is definitely a new thing for me. So I don't know if it sucks or not. You tell me.

With…reviews!


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